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10 rules Dads should know before they go to a pub / bar.

A-drunk-manAgain the days flood past as my rush towards turning 30 continues. Last week my post on the 10 commandments of turning 30 got some great responses so I have decided to follow that post up with another list of my unhelpful advice.

As always with any of my posts I mean no offense, especially to any guys that disagree with any of these rules.  Hey if it works for ya then keep on truckin!

Here is From lad to Dads: How to survive as a Dad in a bar / pub.

  1. If your not single don’t act like you are!
    Pretty straight forward…
  2. Dancing
    OK so your dancing may be a bit creepy anyway but as a Dad over 30 people kind of expect this, which of course means you can get away with it.  The simple rules for dancing without being a creep is keep your hands to yourself, and under no circumstances is it acceptable to bite your bottom lip.
  3. Buying drinks for females.
    When buying your round of drinks just buy what people ask for or have been drinking. Do not be that guy that is trying to get everyone as drunk as possible.  You do not look cool just creepy.
  4. Timing
    As a grown man there is really no need for you to be at a bar on any days besides Thursday – Saturday.  These are the days that society decides its ‘OK’ for Dads over 30 to be at bars, so lets not try and buck any trends how about we just follow the rules society sets aye.
  5. Make sure your not the drunkest person there.
    The ‘star’ of the show!  Its not ideal, take a look around the room every 30 minutes or so, if no one else looks as drunk as you then go and eat a burger or something.
  6.  Eye contact.
    OK so this is kinda weird regardless.  But don’t be that old guy that keeps making eye contact with the younger girls, and especially don’t be that old guy that makes and holds eye contact for too long.
  7. Avoid certain subjects of conversation
    You look old, don’t make yourself sound old as well!  Dont talk about politics, religion, coronation street or anything else that is boring…  Pay close attention to the person your talking too, when their eyes start glazing over your doing it wrong. (If unsure you could always talk about the awesome blog you have been reading, hint hint)
  8. Avoid people under 23 (especially the girls).
    In bars this life form become the mortal enemy.  There is no reason to be seen in a bar post 30 associating with the 21 year olds.  You are simply better off going to talk with the 80yr old dude in the corner staring at the horse races.
  9. Shots
    OK so not necessarily ‘creepy’ but there is no need for a grown arse man with kids, after his 30th birthday to be doing shots.  These small creations are basically little mouthfuls of disaster.  A night on the shots ends well for no one. Besides anything that ‘lil jon’ can sing about can not be sophisticated enough for a 30+ Dad!
  10. Be home by midnight
    Especially if your in a relationship, its just easier to make sure you get home before it becomes the next day.  Besides after midnight your sure to turn into a pumpkin or whatever the story says…

Not a complete list by any means, but generally 10 rules that should be easy enough to follow!

About Sean Davis

A beer drinking, sports watching Dad / blogger that is determined to find ways to laugh his way through kids, babies and pregnant ladies. Its all about using laughter to survive!

13 comments

  1. I agree with most except the Thursday to Saturday statement. Here in my part of the world (Sydney, Australia’s North West growth sector) we have family bars with beer gardens, play areas and bistros. That’s a great place to spend a lazy Sunday summer afternoon, of course with the family.

  2. Nice blog :)

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